define me.

i know. sort of the longest silence for as long as this blog's been up.

because it's been bugging me, whether i'm allowed to say this or not. scroll down, there's that post about stagnating. yes. i'm still stagnating, in that leveling my main, or even my pure doesn't have any meaning. but. something came up. something totally unexpected. but more on it later, i like to break things slowly.

if you already know, meaning this post comes out second for today, then that's probably how you'd define me.

define me.

of course, i'd prefer if you did that in the context of me as a person. and i know that's a tad difficult though, so why not start like this, define me as a player.

that's how every other player would start, anyway.

there's the clothes. i've mentioned that before, scroll down to last month.

and most of all, there's the combat level.

i can see why they chose combat over total, or something. it's an indication of how much danger i pose to you. and when the colours highlight it as the main thing to note, next to the white username, then it's difficult not to asses a person on the sole basis of that.

asses being a softer word for judge.

and judging's wrong, and not judging's difficult. and what's even more so, is not defining yourself, not allowing yourself to be defined by that.

it's easy enough to say. i worked at bringing my combat up to 40. after that, i didn't pay it much mind. but that's another story altogether.

still, the mentality's faintly disgusting. i hear people complaining about being called n00bs. i don't encounter that as often as i'd expected to. and frankly, i don't mind all that much, although others certainly do.

what i do mind is the whole emphasis on combat. it's practical. it makes sense like nothing else would. yet, it's like a regression to the caveman mentality of how well you fight being a reflection of you. the whole you. i mean, i have a name. or, at least, a username. no need to go "level 57".

i go into this determined to keep my combat level exactly where it is, well below 70, below 60 even, just to prove that it has nothing to do with my character, it has nothing to do with my experience, it has nothing to do with the person sitting here typing.

and i'll hear jaws drop when i open my mouth. to be exact, when i hit enter.

of course, i won't say it outright. but my presence screams it, almost. the whole combat thing?

stuff it.

(self)friend.

i find warlock cute. as in, little kid cute. warlock from one of the too many groups boasting an affiliation to the x-men. the way he says things. or just the one phrase that sticks. self friend. (rahne.) weird, but cute.

so that shall be the title of this post. adding, so it isn't as boring as a title. i do suppose he meant, my friend.

that said, i don't quite know who my real friends are anymore. on runescape, that is.

when big things happen, i tend to measure time, and things past by it. before, and after. it's just that those things tend to be superficial, and i end up forgetting the true nature, if you will, of that big event, when i'm swamped with everything else cosmetic. i know i'm not making sense, i'm sorry.

i was freaked. now, i'm just tired.

most people on my friends list on rs just don't log in again, ever, as far as i know. with my friends on rs, i'll talk to them almost everyday. heck, i'll log in just to talk to them, sometimes, but after a few weeks, they'll just disappear, and don't seem to log in ever again.

and i'll miss them, and i drift till i find someone else to talk to.

now, i've got more than my fair share of "friends".

some people are curious, some people take me to be a sentient knowledge base/world clock/quest guide/price guide, some people flame me.

i can take that. i almost enjoy those situations, when i'm taunted, because i'm tested, i need to give a response that doesn't provoke, and is right. what i can't quite stand are the suck ups. one i know's been called that to his face, within my hearing. it's that obvious, even without pm.

it's like, they're acting, they're showing a face to me that isn't theirs, at all. and i don't quite know what to do about it. they ask, i say, be yourself.

in their answer it's just as obvious they have no intention of doing anything of that sort.

and i know i'm just as guilty, sometimes, of acting like a person i'm not. what's worse is, i can't fault them, they're doing nothing wrong, they're being great, really. like the world, real life. so hypocrisy goes on, hypocrites remain pretty much untouchable, and hypocrisy is just let alone, simply because it's valued above outright disrespect by those who matter.

so. my friends list finally reached its f2p limit.

i'm forced to indiscriminately delete the names that come after. and i don't quite understand why people i converse with just don't understand that being on someone's 'freinds list' makes you no more of a friend than the random stranger.

happenings and suchlike.

this weekend, my eyes are open. (despite a cleaning agent trying to swell my eyes shut and asphyxiate me irl...)

so. back to lists.

• why do people crowd around in front of lumby castle, trying their best to get themselves reported,
• seeing as there are mods (a phenomena, i used to think, in itself) in lumby on virtually every crowded server,
• probably doing something the majority of the population won't bother to, by taking advantage of them illegal transections etc, and requests for bf/gf(s),
• which incidentally is "solicitation" and falls under "offensive language", rule one,
• a fact of which many, i amongst them till before this weekend, are aparently blissfully unaware of.

so that's what i could fit into one sentence. on a side note, i've reinforced my realisation that when you're part of a group, the fact that you're part of that group appears to be all the general public sees, and it's on that group that they base their judgement of you.

which totally sucks.

and i'm majorly freaked right now, and keeping my mouth oh so tightly shut. oh forget that here comes a rock golem sheesh there goes prayer i'm pissed. and defeated. waaa. ohnever mind. up a crafting level yay! watch out golem (why golem golum gollum?) you haven't seen the last of me and all that cheesy/corny crap. ew sounds disgusting. cheese and corn.

never mind me. funny how tilting the screen just a wee bit can make the whole mine so much brighter.

wheras clicking sounds softer in the dark.

what's in a name, and all that.

warping established quotes is fun. reading warped versions: even more so.

like shakespeare's "a rose by any other name still smells as sweet." or something similar.

to "a rose by any other name still has thornes."

(i don't rightly know who to credit that to. minisinoo might be a good bet, she writes really well. her plot ideas are good. best of all, she favours the same character i do. meaning that i can stand to read her work without becoming mildly aggrevated by the way she handles her characters. the way i do when i watch some movie adaptations. or read, say, chris claremont's stuff. he's brought the industry far, i'll give him that. but the character he chooses to throw all the limelight at: eech.)

off topic though. hence the parantheses.

when i created my main, the username was my main problem. i wouldn't stand to have numbers in it; numbers betrayed a lack of creativity. i didn't want to come up with a name completely new, that wouldn't leave any impressions.

so i researched (yes actually researched, but minimally) a name obscure enough not to have been used and obscure enough that someone who recognises it would necessarily have enough interest in the subject matter to interest me.

and that's also why, besides my main, i have only one other account i pay any amount of attention to. because i care about the name. and also because i'd prefer to attract similar people, which in a way is another matter altogether.

so that's one thing about names. then.

• some pkers apparently craft complicated names in hopes that people won't easily be able to look their stats up.
• otherwise, the name's a statement of intent. as skills go. or social interactions.
• a statement of interest. outside of the game.
• a statement of adulation. like some kind of tribute.
• maybe even a real life name. somehow i never considered this. (edit: can't say this anymore. after a while, it just got rather tiring, and it seemed easiest to come up with a name at least resembling my own. it's too common for no one to have taken it. besides, i like my name. the switching of accounts in the meanwhile does help, i guess. aly isn't quite my real name, it's more a shadow of a shadow, something similar to my nickname. i just can't risk people i actually know coming across this blog, y'see.)

anyway. names i liked, for various resons. minus the numbers cos i can't remember them. i'll try to add to the list as i go.

• lissabeth.
• daytripper.
• deirdrel.
• arcque.

funny. that's about all i can think of. names don't really mean so much in the long run, i suppose. but for the here and now, if you're a total stranger and the name, aside from the avatar is all i have to judge you by, it does make some sort of difference. especially since these names you can choose for yourself.

stagnating.

i've reached the plateau where leveling skills is just about totally meaningless. interesting skills that is. like most of the things you can do you can't do because you aren't a member. i suppose i should stop playing then. i don't play so much anymore as it is.

i'm blogging so much now, and playing, because the exams are over and i can't bear to start doing what needs doing next.

i've taken to being paranoid when mining. equipping myself with the best shield, boots, ammy and wep in my possession. the latter of which happens to be my pick, so none of these present much of an inconvenience.

all this because i don't want to experience the indignity of having to run from my friend the rock golem, whom/which i've been meeting particularly often lately i.e. almost every mining expedition. which isn't as long by half.

is there a difference between obsession and addiction? i don't believe i'm obsessed. i will consider admitting to myself that i'm addicted.

i know this game's addictive.

i know becoming a member would ensure i am more addicted that than i already am, assuming i am, which is bad enough.

so i suppose this whole problem of stagnating isn't too bad in the long run. i always knew i'll stop someday. the problem just lay in defining someday.

i do believe i'm one of the only people who isn't a member but still has a blog about runescape. i don't believe that's a problem. i'll continue to blog. it's fun. it's an outlet. it's a distraction.

on a sidenote. applauding runescape for banning members macroing. the real world trading thing, i'm not too sure. such a pity for some one who spent almost half a year of his life ingame to lose everything just like that. then again, maybe not. rids him of his addiction (there i go assuming it's a him). or at least gets him to do something about his life.

now the problem's just weaning myself off this without jagex having to do it for me.

because for them to have to do that, that's the ultimate low. that i can't even take control of myself.

accessorising.

you should, actually, skip this shallowness.

i decided that my usual boring image was just boring. so i've put together an eclectic ensemble that would, very likely, turn every guy off.

not that that matters. (if pixels turn you on, you need some help...) usually i preferred to coordinate. boots and vamps as a constant.

• mage hat, robe, ammy, fire staff, d fire shield, red cape, black skirt.
• fire tiara, fire staff, red cape, power ammy, princess blouse, princess skirt.
• mage robes, black skirt, red cape.

how normal, how boring.

today's a bit like going punk. basically being totally abnormal. mining outfit: earth tiara, red cape, def ammy, mage robes, camo bottoms, fighting boots.

nothing really special, just for me it seems downright weird. and i do suppose i won't actually see anyone else dressed like that :P

macroing.

as for people macroing, there seem to be two main types.

people who go to great extents to show they are macroing. with numbers for names, having a combat level of 3, and wearing the basic outfit everyone gets before customising.

people who get mildly creative names, deliberately wear outfits from random events, and raise their combat level to something in the range of 5-10, and give the appearance of having a life outside of systematically mining, or hacking the trees to death.

maybe i should make it three. i hadn't noticed that much before, but there're the people who look every bit like those in category one, except they aren't macroing at all. just earning and earning and earning.

it's actually rather pitiful, when you think about it. not even pathetic, just pitiful.

karamjian musings.

why is there so little demand for swordfish?

why is it that when there is only one uncooked lobbie in your inventory, it inevitably gets burnt?
why do moss giants have better drops than lessers on a day to day basis?

why do ice giants have a lower combat level than ice warriors?

why is the mining guild bereft of any rocks apart from coal and mithril?

why are people macroing so blatantly obvious about it?

why do people accord so much respect/care/attention in general to the sandwich lady?

other random events are so much more funner.

just today. (boringly).

today. involved.

• mining.
• and more mining.
• of coal, then iron, then coal, then mithril, then coal, then gold, then mithril, then iron...
• entry into the mining guild! at last. so many coal rocks! a let down since there's no addy to speak of, but so. many. coal. rocks. so many that you don't even have to wait for respawn time. so many that i am able to formulate a hypothesis that members, upon venturing out into the real world, resort to lowdown undignified tactics because they aren't used to the real world. so many that there're 37, or so i've estimated.
• smelting.
• and more smelting. of steel and gold bars.
• venturing out into the great unknown. with a colour, search-engine equipped, overview-possible map. i.e. going to the wildy to hunt chaos dwarves. and getting nothing but gp. then seeking to explore the lava maze anyway, only to find i've forgotten a knife. a lousy knife. now i do know i deserve to return to
• smithing. steel plates, mainly. and one skirt, and one sword. and
• making >45k! yay!
• finding myself without a goal for the rest of the time. and promptly logging out to blog.

ohyes. record carried over from last time. in the meanwhile i've

• met the rock golem and defeated it! ahahaha. picked up one coal, and savouring the feel of being the victor because more likely than not the next time we meet it'll be lvl 120. that was at the mithril rocks, in any case. and don't come to me for advice, (not that you would, anyway) because quite honestly it was something of a fluke. since f2p has such limited bank space; armour: princess blouse, princess skirt, leather vambraces, leather boots. ammy: power ammy! shield: black square. wep: addy pick. food: one apple pie. attack: everything, haphazardly. prayer: 0/37
• cap'n hand. ~800gp. at the main coal rocks.
• the mom, at the same coal rocks. mysterious box.
• and unrelatedly, while high alching, the mom, en route the mime stage! my first time.

apparently i've developed a liking for lists. back to the real world now.

(italics too! [em] [/em] :D)

planned randomness.

for lack of a membership, i'm still bored. so in an effort to train mage i resorted to mining and smithing to fund it all. i've been in and out of the fally dwarven mines lots recently, and seriously, those random events aren't that random after all. or maybe it's just coincidence? you judge.

• the frog prince paid two visits to the mith rocks. where i happened to be part of the scenery. and frogs seem to pay more attention to scenery than most.
• you know the three coal rocks a little way north of most else? the single one (next to the column); it's started smoking thrice already. i tried the explosion, it cost me 107gp. which isn't all that much, but such a waste. i wonder how they calculate.
• and the same outcrop; the other two coal rocks. rock golems've attacked thrice as far as i've seen. gone for me personally, only once so far.

so there's the recurring ones so far. only few that seem predictable. and even then, not by much. the only time i've had evil bob take me as his slave was at al kharid. fishing. and fishing at lumbridge for the old man's maze. used to get gravedigger alot, but not much anymore. i don't think those have a pattern though.

anyway. for random events karamja seems busiest. almost everybody's been there. other than the obvious people. sandwich lady, mom, frogs, security guard. rick turpentine, cap'n hand, river trolls, that monster fish. anything goes.

random events are so fun, really. they take the monotony out of training. and i know i shouldn't play so much if i'm just doing it for training, like i'm doing know, mining and blogging simultaneously, but it seems such a waste.

and i know i'm just letting them trap me.

and really, what's so wrong with that?